humanityinahandbag:

I know there’s a whole campaign against ghosting going on and really, it’s very warranted. But I think a lot of tumblr babies (and tumblr extremists…. which is like 50% of Tumblr) don’t get what ghosting is. Because I keep seeing it explained incorrectly.

Ghosting is where you cut off or are cut off of a relationship that has been there for a long time without explanation. It’s dabilotating and confusing and can cause unlimited amounts of stress and anxiety on the person being ghosted.

Ghosting is NOT where you cut off communication to someone who makes you feel incredibly uncomfortable. That’s safety. And you don’t owe them explanation.

That guy on Tinder who wants nudes?

That dude from high school who suddenly pops up and is VERY interested in getting together and talking constantly?

That one girl who won’t stop messaging no matter what you do?

That woman who wants to date you so badly she won’t stop texting?

That man you knew years ago who’s convinced you’ll say yes to a date if he keeps asking?

Ignore the shit out of them. Don’t message them. Don’t give them the time of day. Don’t get into a situation where you feel you owe them explanation. It might be in the umbrella of ghosting. But it is in no way wrong for you to go that path.

Thinking you owe explanations because a bunch of people on Tumblr told you that ignoring people is rude is part of the reason so many girls are overwhelmingly anxious about chatting online with new people. If they’re awful. If they make you uncomfortable. If they truly push boundaries. You don’t need to spend time teaching them the correct way to behave. That’s not your job at all. You don’t have to sit them down and explain why you’re dropping off the earth. Just fucking do it.

You’re not paid to be therapists and you’re hardly life coaches. It isn’t your job to be in terrible situations just to appease an internet populuses idea of “rude”

Be rude. I’m giving you permission.

Intenet Jewish Mama OUT.