via CNN: A sexual assault survivor just confronted Sen. Jeff Flake, who announced he will vote to confirm Brett Kavanaugh: “Look at me and tell me that it doesn’t matter what happened to me, that you will let people like that go into the highest court of the land.”
He’s learning that if he forcibly invades a woman’s space, no one will intervene. And therefore nothing is wrong with his actions. If anything people will videotape and giggle about how he’s such a flirt. He’ll be raised believing this is normal behavior.
She’s learning that no one will intervene when someone invades her physical space. The adults who are supposed to take care of her don’t care that she feels uncomfortable. The people who she’s supposed to trust to keep her safe are encouraging this invasion of her body. She’s learning that her feelings aren’t valid. This’ll be followed with “that just means he likes you”. She’ll be taught that invasion of her physical self is what’s expected of her and that this is genuine affection.
this isn’t even where socialization starts
this boy already feels entitled to her body and affection. so much so that literally being shoved to the floor multiple times and running away from him isn’t even a moment’s deterrent and clearly sets off no warning bells that maybe this is something he shouldn’t be doing
and she is learning in this moment that this is normal. that this is acceptable, because no one is stopping it and taking her away and protecting her. her telling him no and pushing him away from her mean nothing. telling men no is pointless and fighting against it is pointless, because they will not stop until they get what they want. even running away will not help.
they have had so much socialization already that their actions are literally mirroring that of society, of rapists and their victims.
notice how he also keeps thrusting his hips at her. you can see he has
the ability to lean forward without doing that, and the fact that he
does (and with intent, as you can clearly see in the 6th gif)
how much you wanna bet he learned that from watching an older family member? from someone out in public? from something on TV?
and the fact that not a single person is stepping in and telling him no is only reinforcing that when girls tell him no and shove him away, all he has to do is keep trying, and he’ll get what he wants.
this is how quickly socialization and misogyny ingrains irreparably in our minds.
Less critically thinking individuals might think that nothing is happening here, but child psychology has told us time and time again that this is the age when humans are learning a massive amount about human interaction.
So many are blind to it because it starts this early. It’s literally from day 1, you’re whole perspective. Men are particularly blind to it because they are benefited rather than subjugated.
^ great point, child development 101 taught me that children are really sponges while they’re in early childhood/toddler stage. They learn from what they see.
Rebloging for ALL the comments.
That poor girl is learning that her “no” doesn’t matter, that it’s a challenge. These may just be children and his actions may seem harmless, but literally no one could interpret her response as positive… well, except males. She is clearly not interested in his interactions at all which is crazy because kids usually love playing with each other, right? Well she doesn’t want to be bothered. Notice how she keeps looking at whoever is filming for help or reassurance… and she never gets it
This is so disgusting. Why isn’t anyone teaching and interrupting that boy? Child socialisation is literally why misogyny is so spread in this world. Now makes sense that why men can’t literally comprehend that No means No. They literally can’t. They literally can’t process in their brains that no means no.
it’s the fact that she wanted to go into her isolated car instead of into the public building. going to her car gets her alone, where as going inside the well lit building with other people gets her around people who could protect both of them from the people she’s claiming are after her.
any actual victim will go straight for a well populated area. they may want you to come with them for help, but they would never try and get you away from a populated area and into an isolated car unless the car was the only option, because a dark car late at night is a fantastic way to isolate and capture a mark without anyone’s notice.
other tactics often used include:
1) pretending to be a heavily pregnant woman stuck out in bad weather she’s not dressed for and asking a good samaritan who asked her if she’s ok to buy her some coffee. if the woman refuses money and wants you to go with her specifically, becoming agitated when you don’t agree and only offer her cash, this is a trick. the person who found this out managed to follow a woman doing this and saw her arguing with another woman and two men. the men insisted she needed to be more convincing so people would be more sympathetic, and she watched her tell him to be the one out in the snow in the thin hoodie and fake belly, and she watched her take off a fake baby bump.
(someone taking the money can still be a scam, but it’s a scam for money, and not to traffic you. traffickers want to get you to leave a populated area, so refusing to go with them will upset them, and that’s the biggest reveal of their true intentions.)
2) a woman banging on your door screaming that a man is chasing her and begging you to let her in, saying he’s going to rape her if you don’t let her in. this was brought to everyone’s attention by a teenager who shared his story about it. his mother wanted to help her, but her husband had grown up in a ‘bad part of town’ and wasn’t so trusting. he unlocked the door but not the chain lock and handed her a brick, telling her his family was calling the police and he would stay with her at the door. if the person did show up she could use the brick to defend herself and he would come out with his..I think it was a baseball bat and help her fight him off. she became very angry, asking what was wrong with them and demanding they let her in. his only response was to close and lock the door again. she got quiet and when the police got there, she was gone but the brick was just sitting on one of their steps.
the next night the police were back, as the woman showed up again at someone else’s doorstep doing the exact same thing, only this time an officer was basically already there. that family had let her in, and she in turn let her partner in who proceeded to murder the entire family before being caught by the officer.
3) similarly, men have been known to use a recording of a baby crying playing at womens’ doorsteps in order to entice them into opening the door, this giveaway being that A) it’s recorded and that’s usually fairly obvious, but also that after a little while, the sound will move, typically under windows around the front of the house, something an actual baby clearly can’t do on its own, and is clearly someone attempting to get closer to the presumed sleeping women in the hopes of getting her attention, since she seemingly can’t hear it from the front door.
this was caught when a woman noticed this ‘baby’ moving and the cry looping and called the police. again an officer was nearby and found two men hiding in bushes around her house.
4)more of an example of something very common, a young woman shared a story of when she was little many years ago. she and a friend were going to some sort of event (she was into something. she was ether part of a sports team or dance team or something to that affect, something done by her school as she was around 6-7 at the time) her mother stopped off at a grocery store real quick and left her and her sleeping friend in the car. another little girl looking to be about 4 was in a car nearby with what this girl assumed was his father. he too got out of the car and left her there, going into the store. the girl was all smiles with him, even waving to our storyteller and smiling, until the man left. once he was inside suddenly she looked scared, and was acting like she wanted her to get out of the car and come to her. she tried waking her sleeping friend to tell her about this, thinking now the man wasn’t her father but someone who was a danger to her, but her friend gave her the dirtiest look, demanded she shut up and let her sleep, and rolled over. she looked back up at the 4 year old who was now looking at the store. she too looked over and saw the man just standing right at the window smiling and encouraging her. she smiled at him and then looked back to our storyteller, with her face instantly dropping back into that scared look on her face. she refused to get out of her car, and when the 4 year old looked back at the store, the man came back out, without having bought anything, gave the girl a smile and a pat and driving off, with the little girl waving at her as he drove away. after seeing this, she was convinced he was coaching her and using her to lure other children out to abduct them.
5)another example of something very common, a woman who was moving to another state and was by herself, as her fiance had gone ahead a month earlier to get things set up in the new place while she tied up the loose ends at the old one. on her way back to her car, she was stopped by a man in his truck, his passenger side between them, and asked her if she knew where a grocery store was. she said she didn’t know, as she was just stopping through on her way to a new place. he then said something along the lines that this was a nice place to stop on a trip with the family, and she admitted she was alone. it was then when he said it was nice to meet her and reached out his hand to shake hers, but did nothing to lean out, meaning she would have to reach in the car to reach him. it was here where she realized his questions confirmed that she was alone, far from home, and unfamiliar with the area, meaning if she vanished no one would know when she vanished or where on her long trip alone, and it would be a good while before anyone expected to see her, meaning by the time anyone realized she was gone she’d be long gone.
she refused to shake his hand, stating that she was going to go, and he sped off, far too fast for her to read the license plate.
the one thing all these stories have in common, the thing that’s kept people alive, was their refusal to give in to social expectations and protecting themselves as well as the person supposedly in need. by refusing to get into her car, the op story woman saved herself from being abducted and trafficked, as did my last story’s woman, by refusing to be polite and shaking the stranger’s hand.
Op’s woman still attempted to help her, so you absolutely can still help someone in need, but you have to do so safely and logically, without putting yourself at risk, which is exactly what these people need you to do. while it’s true a real potential victim could be screaming at your door for help or a real baby left on your doorstep that’s crying, you still have to be cautious because traffickers have no morals. there is no low they won’t stoop to if it means catching another person.
I know it can be hard to believe a woman would do something like this to other women, and not using such chances to get away themselves, but that’s what brainwashing, Stockholm syndrome, and abusive manipulation will do to someone’s mind. we all want to trust other women and believe in that solidarity against our mutual oppression, but it doesn’t always work out like that. girl code and solidarity is important, but we also have to watch our for ourselves, because not everyone cares about that code.
About a year and a half ago I was having coffee with one of my professors and she said how she knew a woman who back in the 70’s wanted to be a child star. The woman’s mother was one of those shitty “Showbiz Moms” who push their kids to be actors or singers or whatever. So anyways apparently there was some movie executive who was a known pedophile in industry and took an interest in her. At the time she was like 7-9 years old and her mother pulled her aside and basically said “it’ll hurt at first but don’t you want to be a star?” And essentially handed her kid over to the guy and let her stay at his house overnight. She went to pick her up and that was the last time they ever saw that executive. She was never given a role or anything. My professor said how that’s a wildly common story in the industry of how some parents will just pass their onto some studio exec or producer in order to land a role.
yup. it is common, its the way it all goes, thats why my mom never pushed me or let me do films, other than being an extra because anything more would mean going to a “children’s” party where the only adults present were strange executive men.
and what she says is what showbiz moms always say: “yeah it sucks, but close your eyes, it’ll be all over, and we’ll be rich, and you’ll have everything”.
She mentioned those parties and how parents aren’t invited and stuff. In the wake of the metoo movement I feel like that needs to be addressed. Like there has to be a correlation between many child stars developing drug habits and going off the deep end later on in life and these creepy executives.
This post has been going around the past couple of days and I’m sad to report that it’s not true and that OP is one of those freaky anime nazis so please RB or something so it stops getting notes
When Abigail Echo-Hawk first started her job as director of the Urban Indian Health Institute, she felt compelled to open the bottom drawer of a file cabinet in the corner of her office.
Among a dozen files inside, she noticed one labeled “Sexual Violence.”
Echo-Hawk had stumbled upon a copy of questions from a 2010 survey, co-produced by the health institute and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), documenting experiences of sexual violence among Native-American women living in Seattle.
The survey findings alone are shocking: 94 percent of the 148 women interviewed, all of whom identified as American Indian or Alaska Native, reported they had been raped or were coerced into sex at least once in their lives. […]
ForLoveFromFear 