marzipanandminutiae:

ohfortheloveofgaming:

floweryfallacies:

etrianexplorer:

mindfulwrath:

estrellian:

stimmyabby:

kittleimp:

otorohanga:

• essential supplies include: plenty of food and water, a change of socks, a hat, rope, bandaids, a knife, gloves, an acorn in your pocket, and an offering
• there are always odd noises on the farm. half of them come from the animals
• try to forget what the lake looks like between the hours of three and four AM
• never ever find yourself alone in the milking shed in the south end of the farm. time passes differently there
• if you happen to hurt yourself in your exploration, make sure you do not bleed onto the dirt
• bring plenty of water, you do not want to drink from there
• the cows will watch you, this is normal
• close every gate you open, even if the fields are empty. don’t ever leave one open behind you, just trust me
• beware unstable rocks, the cracks tend to be filled with insect nests
• bring a weapon with you, but no guns
• if you see someone else while exploring, never tell them your name. you can never be sure if they are real or not, and further out you go, the less real they will seem. the patupaiarehe have evolved in cruel and unusual ways
• do not go inside the empty share-milkers cottages, whatever you do, do not go inside. something else lives there now
• a tree with the undersides of its leaves showing mean that a storm is coming. a tree with no leaves means the storm has already come
• sometimes the hills look like they’re moving. be aware of this, because some things don’t like to be disturbed
• do not sleep under the full moon, in fact, just don’t sleep on the farm
• finding skulls is normal, only become worried when you start finding ribs
• if you find yourself lost in a forest, continue walking in a straight line until you are free again. the trees may make it look as though you are going in circles, but i promise you’re not. ignore the soft music you can hear
• your phone won’t work out here
• the ghosts from the land wars won’t harm you, but be sure to show them respect
• don’t take anything from the farm with you when you leave. just be grateful you have made it out alive

This is labeled as New Zealand Gothic so there are a few things specific to NZ here, but I live in Michigan and let me tell you. This isn’t a joke, not is it region specific. There is a farm my father has visited since childhood that never felt right. He once saw a black mass that they don’t like to talk about. A few years ago a swarm of flies attacked his tent one morning while he was camping with a friend. That same day, he became suddenly and violently ill. He brought whatever attached itself to him back home and it didn’t leave until we did a full cleansing ritual.

Do not fuck around on farm land. Especially if you don’t know what was on that land before it.

@aprilwitching

I actually need to add to this because there’s some stuff the locals out in Missouri told me.

• around dawn/dusk/twilight if you feel something behind you, don’t turn around.  Even if you are in an open field
• you hear a woman crying in the woods, hope that its probably a cougar.  dont go looking for it
• avoid the woods around these farmlands if you can
• dont cross streams
• try not to be there around the evening time.  whatever you’re feeling will get worse and might follow
• if you’re religious, don’t bring any artifacts of such if you can.  crosses etc.  it can upset whatever is there.  
• I dont care how pretty the rock is, don’t pick it up
• avoid going in most buildings.  not just the ones listed above.  especially barns.  look in, look around, don’t physically walk in there. not only is it structurally unsafe, you don’t know whats hiding in there.  corporeal or not.
• lastly, before you leave.  check your belongings and pockets and anywhere anything you can stash stuff in. chances are you will be missing something, that’s normal.  if you had something there you didn’t before.  sometimes they just happen to be there even with no recollection.  get rid of it on that land, not off of it!

A Simplified Guide To Exploring Abandoned Farms, by MindfulWrath

• Don’t

@floweryfallacies

Don’t forget that if you start singing and something joins in, do not look for it.

No matter what you do, do NOT attempt to communicate with spirits. They are many, they are ancient, and they are powerful.

Those flowers are beautiful but do not take one for yourself, you’re proposing a trade with the land and you will not like what it decides to take in return.

If you feel like you’re being followed, don’t turn around but walk over the cow grates half buried in the ground. This will make them stop.

And the last thing I’ve learned, whatever you do or don’t believe, these lands abide by different rules and they abhor having these rules broken.

As someone who lived on a farm in Nebraska, I can absolutely reassure you this is true and should absolutely believe it.

The farm areas work a little differently in my area, and I’m not sure if anyone has a similar area, but I’ll add to this just in case.

• Avoid the train tracks. Something is always waiting there. Whether it wants to hurt you or just wants to watch depends on its mood.

• Don’t follow the strange lights. Avoid them at all costs.

• Do NOT follow the dirt road at sunset or nighttime. The ones who wait there do not like you and are willing to do anything to get you out, including hurt you.

• If you are in a car and feel as though you are being followed, DO NOT look in the back seat. There will ABSOLUTELY be something there, and sometimes these things do not want to leave after being seen. They feed off your attention.

• If you’re being followed, get out of that area and go a but further. Maybe a lot further. They like to ensure you won’t come back. (I never learn)

• DO NOT speed to get away from something that’s following you, especially near the train tracks or on the dirt road. They will match your speed, no matter what it is. They’re trying to spook you. They’re trying to get you out of their territory. Speeding on these roads only heightens your chance of a crash.

• Try not to listen to the growling or howling. Don’t yell at it. It’s not always your dog(s). Yelling attracts it to you.

• AVOID THE FREAKING BARN. AVOID THE AREA SURROUNDING THE BARN. DO NOT MESS WITH THE BARN.

• IF YOU OPEN A GATE, S H U T . I T .

• You WILL see things. Do NOT investigate the black, hunkering figure in the distance. It disappears when you get close. It might be trying to lead you away. I don’t know enough about it yet, and I don’t want to.

• If you’re in pain for seemingly no reason, get out of that area fast. Something’s trying to hurt you.

• Don’t challenge them. They WILL win.

People who think these kind of posts are fiction (unless explicitly stated) or overreacting must have had such boring childhoods

I envy people who think these posts are fiction and wish I’d had your childhood instead of mine.

Honestly tho, the biggest thing is to always always always be polite, be clear about your intentions, ask permission, and listen to the answer. And leave your name with the car.