toospoopyformyshirt:

me: in order to not feel bad about being underqualified for every job i’m applying to, I need pretend I’m playing ‘Snake Oil Salesman’ and the product I’m selling is a person with my qualifications, and all the cool features it has are things on my resume

adhd brain: *slaps roof of self* THIS BABY CAN FIT SO MUCH FUCKING LAB SAFETY IN IT!